Saturday, September 25, 2010

Hello, You! Now skedaddle!!




Somebody dropped by to visit owner the other day. She was quite startled and unprepared.  To be fair she was entitled to be shocked.  She really hadn’t seen the guy since Benj was born and that was 22 years ago.  She didn’t like him then and she doesn’t  like him now.  Her worry is that now he knows where she lives in Texas and he’ll be dropping by every once in a while so  they can reacquaint themselves.   Curly haired doesn’t like the guy  hanging around but he can’t just grab the guy and toss him on his ear now, can he?  If you think that is Curly’s style then you don’t know Curly haired.  You don’t just throw people out of your apartment because they dropped by unannounced.  I must have been asleep on the patio because I missed his arrival.  I’d like to see him up close so  I’m watchin’, waitin’, an hopin’  but  it feels like   

It is terrible knowing that a stalker has his eye on Owner.  Stalker seems to be the most appropriate word.   He’s only dropped by that one time but I just know he wants to come back to see her again.  Whenever  we step outside and do a tiny tour around the building, or head to our car,  I hear that intake of breath, watch her stop, stare straight ahead and I know she sees him.  I look as hard as I can but my vision just isn’t as keen.  This guy doesn’t have the usual “human” smell…..he’s that creepy. A sad complication of his visit  is that owner deals with fear by avoidance so I’m getting outside even less than last week. 

Luckily owner took a course and then volunteered at the hospital  with sexual assault victims.  She understands this whole stalking thing so I have faith that she will get a handle on this guy. I can’t wait to see her tell him to back off, when she is angry she gets LOUD.  At Stock Photography: Box Cartoon Character Screaming Into a Megaphonethe moment though she is living in fear of another surprise ambush; the first one wore her out so badly she slept for twelve hours afterwards.

I admit that I don’t like seeing Owner under so much stress. My television viewing has changed to “dog training videos”  but those attack dogs scare ME and I AM A DOG.  I’d rather just show my teeth and make some good “Chow Chow” noises.   As you all know I’m a lover not a fighter but I’ll keep her safe if she needs it. Heading off now to work on my growl.


I have my work cut out for me.  I’m on a mission to find, attack and eliminate Owner’s visitor.  When I find you, Monsieur, Monsieur Nerve Pain, you are going to wish you never ran into Casey, Attack Dog Extraordinaire. 

See ya later.

Not sure this will be as effective for me as I don’t have all my teeth!

Loyal American readers will understand this cartoon much more than you readers from around the world. (and so you know…her foot continues to heal, slowly, painfully sometimes, but heal).

Saturday, September 18, 2010

It would be rough to go it alone!



Two weeks can feel interminable.   Owner is worse than useless.  Curley isn’t into taking me for long walks on his own…oh, he gets the job done but he’d much rather have company plus his job demands he be away from the apartment a lot.  I don’t need much but I’m bored out of my dog-like little mind!


If I sit here long enough she’ll take pity 052on me and get me outside.  It has been two weeks and I’ve heard enough about the boot and the crutches.  Scarlett….Frankly, I don’t give a damn.  

Heaven, I’m in heaven.  Aldo and Tina dropped by take me for a walk.  You have no idea how many meals I’ve saved071 up for a long walk…if you know what I mean.  Tina is in for a surprise.  Hope she has lots and lots and lots of those bags humans like to carry.  You’re going to need them baby! This dog is heading out to let loose and lighten the load.

Well it isn’t Telluride but it sure is pretty. My coat is heavy but I can’t take it off because I’ll freeze to death when I get back home. Evolution has to work on this only sweating through the paws and tongue thing.  I’m a Texas dog no longer.


If you have to live in a neighbourhood in a suburb, this ain’t bad.


You’ll see below I quickly put Tina to work…..that’s why we dogs hire humans to look after us.  We can’t do it ourselves and actually we don’t want to! Besides, she’s so good natured and cheerful I just can’t get too worked up about it.   She works out and does tons of squats just for the heck of it so might as well give her a reason to work those quads and hamstrings that actually does something for the environment.  How “green” of me, eh?

081     119

We hooked up with some other guy and Aldo just had to show off his Olympic time trial results.  I mean the guy is young and fit so of course he can go from zero to sixty in less than a second.  I gave it my best shot but I’m just not as good as I once was, but I’m as good once as I ever was…..gee, where are all these quotes coming from.  Obviously been listening to the country station just a tad too much….however it is what it is.


This is an eye test.  How many dogs are in this photo?  Hope you said three.


If you are into Ayervedic Medicine or perhaps want to do a little Transcendental Meditation, we have the temple for you.  This incredibly gorgeous architectural marvel is right smack dab in our neighbourhood.  It may not be your thing but it does add a sense of peace and beauty to the area.  It’s pretty quiet over there; they must meditate really well and often.  Some locals were really terrified and concerned about cults taking over The Woodlands when these guys came to town, but  you’d never know they were here.  Owner thought it took courage on the part of the group to even move to this neck of the woods given the general religious nature of south Texas, however, so far so good for all concerned.  They probably just pretend the other isn’t here.


So on we go with our walk.  I enjoy every second I’m outside.  One thing about heat and humidity is that everything smells richer and more exotic.  The swampy water….sublime.  Rotting vegetation… infusing. It must be such a drag to be a human and not have a tremendous nose.  You think you have everything but guys you miss a lot.  


Now it is time to get back in the car and head home.  I had a great day….in fact owner’s friend took me out several days in a row.  Thanks Tina.  Thanks Aldo.(and a big shout out to Becca too!)  You made my weeks of confinement with Scarlett a lot less painful.  Her stitches come out next week and hopefully we can get back to some semblance of normal.  Oh Lord, I sure hope so.

Just checking that this is really Aldo and that  I’m in the right car. Aldo speaks English, Dutch and some Tamil…so a sniff is my best way of identifying him.  He gets confused sometimes and speaks in the wrong language which truly messes me up.  Yes, you heard it from me  - there are multilingual dogs.


Yup, right car.  Right dog.  See ya later.


Don’t forget to tell your friends to find me on Facebook. Just type in Telluride Dog Blog when you are checking your own Facebook page and sign on to become a Fan.  You’ll be hanging with a great crowd.  Never hesitate to drop me a line.  I LOVE correspondence.

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Michael and Shannon Sitting in a Tree!


Well folks, I’m back.  Owner had an operation and I got to go on a vacation for a few days to get away from the stress and strain of her hobbling around with crutches.  Ah, bliss.  I went for a swim every day down at Dog’s Day Inn, perfect antidote to the September heat of Houston. Nothing better than someone bringing your food directly to your kennel every morning, giving  you a “wakey wakey” pat and just generally spoiling you rotten for a few days. Where would we dogs be without our all-inclusive vacations every once in a while.  Sure it can cost a pretty penny but I’m worth it.  However, I was worried that owner would be languishing in the apartment without me to keep her company so dutifully I returned home. 

Yesterday  I got one of the  best hairdos of my life.  It’s been a long haul with my thyroid issues and patchy fur, bristly regrowth.  My ego had been run over with a transport truck!  Luckily,  those girls down at the spa really took some time to give me the perfect blow out…and the scent of the shampoo – let us simply say I have been sniffing my own fur ever since I got home.  Maybe there really is something to this “not rolling in dead things” idea. 

But back to my headline.  One of my favourite guys is tying the old knot, and it couldn’t happen to a nicer guy. Michael is the person who found me when I was thrown out like an old piece of junk mail. To look at me now it is hard to believe I was once a reject isn’t it?  Those people were  stupid because apparently I’m the smartest and most gorgeous dog who ever lived.   I heard Owner and Curly haired  tried to figure out how to make it to the nuptials but she is barely maneuvering with the crutches. Throw in  painkillers and you don’t end up with a pretty picture as Owner tries to waddle down the aisle to her seat.

None of us have  met Shannon but we’ve heard as many wonderful things about her as I’ve heard about myself so you know she has to be pretty darn special. Let me simply state she was willing to put on fire fighting equipment and head into a  “training” burning building with Michael, a volunteer fireman….he’s not going to find a lot of other women anxious to do that to show their commitment!  Michael is an honourable, responsible, loving guy and so we are delighted he found someone to share the rest of his life. It is worth waiting when you know what you want; the perfect woman doesn’t just pop along every day, eh?

He’s so responsible that he made me spend a day and a half or so locked in a tiny bathroom a few years ago.  He kept me company and so did his dogs.  He reinforced the bathroom walls with old tires and things to make everything stronger and safer and then we  locked ourselves in there with some water and some food and passed the time.  Weird eh?  Weird until you know Hurricane Rita was passing by, through, and around us.  The power got knocked out for two weeks or so and Texas without electricity is almost unbearable.  He was with us every step of the way even when he was offered accommodations with air conditioning.  He’s nothing if not loyal! Owner and Curly were up in  Maine checking out that girl, College,  Benj was so into for four years – still don’t like that chick. She’s no Shannon let me tell you that! Benj dropped her last May.  His new girlfriend is called Work and apparently she lives in Boston – not crazy about her either to be honest.  Why can’t he be satisfied with me?….smart, gorgeous and my fur looks fab when blown out properly.

Owner has always had a thing for Michael. Oh don’t be ridiculous…not that kind of thing.  She just knew he was a special guy.  It was something ephemeral; something she could never quite put her finger on.  Now she knows what it is…..owner has a softspot for men who love and marry women with children.  Obviously this is a cause near and dear to owner’s heart since she was one of those women when Curly found her and swept her off her feet.  Jon and David thought Abe had lost his mind….think of all the money you could have if you didn’t have us…but he was not to be deterred.  Oh, owner will give a big song and dance about marriage, schmarriage, it’s not the deal of the century…..but she wouldn’t trade one minute of her life with Curly-haired for a life without him in it.  Let me just say she blows a lot of smoke that he has trouble seeing through.

She hopes Shannon has the same  disposition and appreciates the special qualities that led Michael to her and her beloved daughters.  Men like Michael and Curly haired, and to be fair, women who marry men with children and love them as their own, are not a dime a dozen.  It is like finding the perfect Shamrock.  Are shamrocks and the perfect four leaf clover related?

So Michael…thanks for rescuing me.  Thanks for teaching me right from wrong. A word of advice – the girls will respond to love and kindness the same way I did but you can probably replace the dog biscuits with something a bit more to their liking…say ice cream?  I couldn’t have had a better first home and I wish you years of love, laughter and family memories. See ya later (big guy).