Saturday, October 30, 2010

Happy Hallowe’en





Between pumpkin carving and travelling 1,200 miles we are exhausted.   So this week…just a few jack o’lantern photos to enjoy.

I usually stay away from sharp objects.


I think I know this guy!


My friend Eloise says to eat your veggies.



Good Lord this is taking forever



Jack loves me too – look at his grin!


  I hear a bunch of people are coming over tomorrow to make fools of themselves so I should have some good material for you next week.  AND, a few dogs are likely dropping by too.  How lucky am I.  I LOVE Hallowe’en…..maybe not as much as Owner’s Dad  (81) who spent two hours in the  costume department sorting out his costume for this Hallowe’en.  Now there’s a guy who really gets the importance of letting loose and being a kid forever!   Stay safe.  See ya later.


Sunday, October 17, 2010


OUCH.  I would not want to be a human for anything.  Everybody tries to please everybody else and sometimes it just goes terribly wrong.

Settle in and put on a warm sweater  because it is going to get a little chilly around here.  Owner knows she’s not as “up” as Curly. If you read my posts regularly you know he’s the type of guy up for anything, any time, anywhere. Owner….not so much.  When she’s up for something she’s 100% in but if she’s not, she ain’t even showing up.  One raised eyelid over her bulging eyeball and Curly knows that his great idea has been shot down AGAIN.

So owner sat and thought about her generally less than boisterous attitude all week and decided she needed to get her act together.  I stood behind her loyally because that’s just what dogs do even though I knew it meant me being left at home alone for hours.  She came up with two great ideas.  1.  Go to a presentation at the Houston Zoo by a world acclaimed naturalist/photographer.  Unfortunately Curly couldn’t go as he had Australians he had to meet with.  OK no go, on with the backup plan. 2.  Go to some musical repertory theatre downtown.  Curly was on that like glue but  came up with his own play he wanted to go and see.  It was a one-woman comedy written and acted by a young Canadian.  NOW Owner knew she had to agree to this because a) she never wants to do anything that involves driving downtown and b) she is always telling  Curly to PLEASE pick something you would like to do.  She was between a rock and a hard place if you get my drift; she had to agree that his play was at least as good as the one she had picked out.

They looked great as they headed out the door for dinner downtown at Benjy’s. Owner remembered to put on her “I’m so excited to head out and do something FUN face.”  As a bonus  the restaurant’s waiter was very “hot” in a Brazilian kind of way so Owner enjoyed her meal very much.  However, he did take some fun out of ordering by commenting constantly on which meals would be healthy enough to eat.  Curly ended up with some tofu thing (read paw down throat!) and Owner had a hot salad…which I hear was not her favourite meal of all time. But be that as it may they were out, they were doing something FUN, and Owner wouldn’t have to come up with some great new activity for at least six months.  Things were looking up.

Dark was descending as they began their drive to the theatre.  Owner suddenly remembered Curly had made a strange statement about the theatre when she had asked where it was located.  He didn’t say where it was exactly but he did throw in the comment…”don’t worry it’s near a police station.” Owner was busy putting her makeup on at the time so the comment slid off her shoulders like water off a duck’s back.   His questionable remark hung like an echo as they drove down a dark street; the darkness seemed impenetrable.   Curly decided to follow orders and conversate, so forged ahead with a risky statement. She has been pestering him to talk so she is to blame for his incessant chatter; the old be careful what you wish for. What he said was, “well, we aren’t in the best neighbourhood but it isn’t the worst.”  Owner may need to shave her neck today because she suddenly realised how many hairs were standing up back there as he  continued his  monologue.  The next words flew at lightning speed  out of Owner’s mouth. “Oh My God, I’m pretty sure those are Crack houses!”   She did a quick estimation of the value of the BMW and how angry people would be if they asked her to hand over her purse since it had two lipstsicks and a lipliner.  Curly reverted to typical Curly…”fine, we’ll turn around and go home then.” Owner gets tired of the perpetually upbeat, everything is great attitude he always tucks into an easily accesible pocket, sort of a ‘don’t leave home without it’ accessory.   “Oh, we aren’t going to go  home,” she grumbled.  “Where the hell is the damn theatre, anyway?”   “Here,” as he drove into the gravelled lot in front of a building made out of wall panelling in a definite drive by neighbourhood. As she related the events thus far I could tell that the plans for a fun night out  were definitely on a downturn

Two ladies  parked beside them and tentatively opened the door of their van and in quavering voices, asked “have you ever been here before; we were wondering if we should even go in?”   They were obviously petrified to get out of their car and/or  leave it in this highly suspect lot.  (Hey, we watch a lot of The Closer and Brenda Lee Johnson has probably warned people about leaving their cars here.) Curly had no patience for these two  wimpy,  whiney women; in fact he had no patience for his own!  Owner told me later she slunk into the darkened  room and took her seat in one of the fifty “in need of cleaning” seats, crossed her legs, double crossed her arms,  her toes,  and made the sign of the cross with her fingers as she prayed she’d make it home in one piece.  When Curly tried to engage her in conversation she crossed her eyes.  She whispered loudly that if this had been their first date she would NEVER have gone out with him again.  Why? he asked all big eyed.  Curly has a sense of humour because he did say, “I guess you don’t want to take out a theatre membership?”   At that point there could have been a murder in the theatre and we all know who would have been doing what to whom!

She had thought she was being so sweet offering to go to the THEATRE and here she was in a building made of wall panelling.  What better target audience to rob than stupid white people going into a neighbourhood they have no business in after dark.   She prayed the theatre owner  still had a good relationship with everyone on the street, after all this building had been the store his parents ran when he was a young boy.

To be fair owner has to admit ninety percent of the people who came in the door looked quite comfortable being there.  The woman next to Owner admitted she was terrified the first time she came to see a play here also but that this was her third time returning and she hadn’t lost a car yet.  Owner snorted as warmly as she could.

Owner blames her inability to move comfortably  through neighbourhoods different from her own on her very sheltered growing up where everyone lived in  pretty much the same neighbourhood.  Nowhere was dangerous unless you count the bears that wandered the streets in the Fall and the Spring.  One night Dave Grignon’s  escaped pet skunk scared her as she came home on a date but that was about as nerve wracking as it got in Northern Ontario.  Let’s not forget that her milieu in Texas is pretty sheltered and no Canadian arrives in the States without knowing that this is a country with neighbourhoods that are different than we are used to. American TV doesn’t make us yearn for everything made in the U.S.A.

Now, let me see if I can tell you about the play. I only have a dog brain and this just doesn’t make sense to me.  We have ONE young cute Canadian actress, Gemma Wilcox,  who has come in for the debut of her show Shadows in Bloom.  Now this woman must suffer from personality disorder because in the course of an hour she was….Sandra, Pete, Kate, Louise, Flora, a torch singer in a bar, a saxaphonist, bass player, drummer, a Calla LILY, Louis the French sunflower, AND a child’s blankey. Every character had a different voice, mannerisms, needs, desires, and wants and this Gemma was up to the task.  Owner’s head was spinning as they left wondering how this young woman had been able to convince the audience moment after moment that she was who she was pretending to be …and she was each character for one, two, twenty,  forty seconds and then switched into the other character, and back and forth and back and forth.  Whirlwind effect.   You had to be there I guess because it just doesn’t make sense to me. 

Gemma worked her magic.  The car was still there. Everyone who entered the theatre left safely.  Two  women were out chatting at their fence line as Owner and Curley drove away….making the neighbourhood look, well gee…kind of like a neighbourhood.    Owner gave her head a shake, (as her brother-in-law Jim would tell her to do), and admitted the play was well done.   The car heater came on for a second  to melt some of the ice that had accumulated on those crossed legs and arms.  Divorce avoided for another day.  See ya later.   

Saturday, October 9, 2010

So this big fat Martian……



As long as I live I will never understand humans.  All of this crazy stuff is going on with the Nobel Peace Prize and China and what do Owner, Curly and their friends talk about last night…..a big fat Martian landing in New Jersey and eating  Italians.  Now I did hear this through thick plate glass so I can’t be sure of all the details, but I’m pretty sure I have the gist of that movie plot.    Next they would all laugh and slap each other’s backs, make some asinine comments, laugh some more and then look at another card in a box and try to define the word “liripoop.” I think they were half in the bag because a big bottle of champagne went down.  Just in case you are wondering…..Benj’s graduating class at Bates forgot to adjust their liripoops at the end of the ceremony…and I hope so too because he was brought up better than that!   Oops, I stand corrected.  Now I recall that a liripooimagep is the tassley bit on the graduating cap…who knew?  I will say this though everybody had a fall on the floor time as various participants physically demonstrated how they thought a liripoop needed to be adjusted.  They are all nice humans but sophisticated?…they must have their own definitions for THAT word.  Oh by the way, if you are ever wandering through New York with your donkey, it  is either forbidden to bray between the hours of midnight and 6 a.m. or sleep in the bathtub. I got a bit confused on that question.   However, one smart ass answer was they aren’t allowed to bray towards Mecca which caused great chuckling since who doesn’t love a well done play on words.  It’s all just a load of Balderdash if you ask me.

My pal Louis, the African breed without a barker and an insatiable need to play tricks on their owners, and I just played with abandon as we ran around the property out back. Louis The temperature was cool, the night was young, and the humans had no idea what we were up to.  We chased skunk smell around the yard for a while, rolled in leaves,  drank out of the pool,  and  climbed on the furniture. What dog doesn’t get a kick out of rubbing their snotty nose all over clean windows.  Wonderful evening.   I love it when WE get invited out for the night;  it is a real break from apartment living.  And just in case you are wondering, Louis doesn’t wear his cowboy costume all the time, just when he damn well feels like it.  Don’t you wish you looked as good in YOUR chaps and lasso?

Had a little trip to the dog spa yesterday and had the usual doggie necessities taken care of.  Who wants toenails that click every time they meet a tile floor. My teeth were brushed…YUCK.   My going away present (scarf)  is DSCN1328fabulously covered with silvery sparkly bits that shine in the evening. No one has ever thought to decorate me with some bling before and it just feels so right.  It must be noted that scarves scare me.   Last time   my foot caught in it when I scratched my head and poof I lost my balance and fell off the bed.  My leg could have broken! 

Think I’ll go shake some tail.  See ya later.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Let the mind just wander…I’m good at that.



The dreaded words -- Leash ‘em up ‘cause here comes a Chow. The hair on the back of my neck stands up; am I in danger? Where is that dreaded Chow? Oh wait, it’s me.

(OK..this isn’t me but have you ever seen a cuter Chow Chow in your life….is this Panda Chow?  And I thought I was cute!  Do you smell hair dye?)

People need to learn that it is not the breed that is scary; it is irresponsible, clueless, couldn’t train a dog if they tried owners.   To be honest the smaller the dog the less likely it is to have manners. Sorry to be so prejudiced but humans seem to think that  if it is a teensy tiny pouffy pup then it doesn’t need to know to sit, stay, wait, and SHUT THE HELL UP.  What is it with little dogs barking at me as if they are going to eat my head off. Being barked at by a puff ball is definitely one of my pet peeves.  Mind you we did have a great friend with a gorgeous Bouvier, Shadow,  (good friend of Boris) who jumped on to the chesterfield from the backside of the couch, and who ran through a plate glass window so maybe my size prejudice isn’t fair.



A lot of my time is spent dreaming about the white stuff.  Howling winds and blizzards turn my crank! Happy skiers make my day. Ice balls stuck in my paws….not so much.   Hopefully by the time I get home snow will be a weekly teaser.  Owner was on the phone with her friend, Shannon,  talking about Chloe and I getting in lots of cross country skiing this winter.  Can’t wait.  I eat my special oil-laced dog food, take my glucosamine, my thyroid pill and my arthritis drug every single day.  This keeps my joints oiled and my body willing. The spirit? never a problem.




Owner’s foot seems to be getting a bit better every day. I think this means that soon we will be heading back to the land of the happily roaming sniffing dog.  Oh Lordy it has been a while.  Luckily for me I’ve been spending lots of time with Aldo and he’s a blast to hang out with.  Aldo may be looking for a home if Tina returns to her home country. There is no freedom at all for dogs in Singapore so she’s trying to figure out what to do.  We have a lead on a fun place for Aldo to call home but it is early days yet.  The words Tina and Aldo, Aldo and Tina fit so well together that I can’t imagine one without the other.

Every day I take a little visual check of Owner’s aforementioned appendage.   For a while it looked like a lot like my tongue, black and blue.   She seems to have more of a shuffle in her step.   Getting in and out of the tub is not quite the production it was a couple weeks ago.  Curly doesn’t seem to have to fetch and carry quite as much as he did  at the beginning of the recuperation period.  Slowly but surely we are getting back to normal. I have to say we have watched so much of The Closer that it feels like Brenda Lee Johnson  is a close and personal friend, even if she is rather cranky and selfish.

broken foot cartoons, broken foot cartoon, broken foot picture, broken foot pictures, broken foot image, broken foot images, broken foot illustration, broken foot illustrations

  Now it all depends on what the doctor and the physiotherapist say….how did it end up that my life depends on two people I have never met?  Somehow it doesn’t seem to bother this doctor guy that I’m missing golden hills, falling leaves, and cold temperatures. It took a lot of work to grow my fur this year and I’d really like to show it off.


dog pumpkin carving 

It would be really nice to be back for jack o’ lantern season. See ya later.