Life is driving me insane. Everything I know and understand has turned upside down. One minute my food and water are next to the kitchen and then they are in the back bathroom and then moved downstairs to the hallway ….oops, no, now in one of the spare bedrooms. The furniture is all scrunched together, plastic bags are covering everything, and then strangers come to visit and take over our upstairs. What the hell is going on around here? If curly haired was here none of this would be happening. In fact I heard owner say, of course this happens when curly haired isn’t here.
What happened was Shannon (Marjenhoff) dropped by and told us we were bland. Personally, I like bland. My fur stands out against bland really well and bland makes me happy. Bland means nothing unusual is disrupting my world. Anyway, Shhhhhhhannnnon told us red and mustard, yup red and mustard was the way to go. Owner has absolutely no artistic talents whatsoever so bought into the programme completely. The night before the strangers arrived owner had a few nightmares….mustard, what was I thinking? mustard? Luckily there are all different colours of mustard and ours was just the pale mustard seed.
Decorating advice led to complete and total disarray in our household and what felt like hundreds of trips to Alpine Lumber for yet ANOTHER gallon of paint. We couldn’t even sleep in our usual spots. This made Don as happy as could be since it meant he got paroled for the night (read out of the crate). He bounced right on to the bed in the spare room and didn’t move a muscle for ten hours.
I’ve been watching him. Creeping suspicion tells me that Don knew Shannon from somewhere else and somehow he’s responsible for this entire shamozel going on in our condo. It’s obvious he’s in love with her. He spent a lot of time fawning around hoping she would take him home. Unfortunately, she didn’t.
While all this was going on we were still trying to take care of the birds. They are actually getting downright demanding. One bird spent a bit of time traipsing around our front step as if he wanted to come in and get his own damn bird seed. Who does he think he is! I decide, well really owner decides, if he gets fed. We ran out of “cow fat” (yum my favourite) this week so the birds got a lot of peanut butter mixed with bread crumbs, oatmeal and a few cranberries. We are apparently running a restaurant for gourmand birds. Our offerings had huge appeal…so much so that a neighbour’s dog came by and would not leave until he had eaten the entire mess. I think he was just stupid; probably thought he was eating the cow fat because the snow retained that odour. What self-respecting dog eats cranberries? Well, maybe Eloise, she does eat carrots after all.
Don’s poster is up at Mountain Tails and no, it isn’t a wanted poster. Well, actually it is I guess. It is a “family wanted” poster. He’s still looking. We had a good lead but it fell through like leads tend to do. He’s settled right down and now owner can get out of the house and enjoy some of what Telluride has to offer. We figured out he simply had to get out of his crate. All he wanted was to chillax with me in the front hall on a dog bed chewing yet another disgusting tendon thing that he likes. Poor guy, he’s only nine months old but he’s spent a lot of time living in a crate. Don’t get me wrong, he says everyone at Second Chance is super nice. In fact we met his regular Wednesday dog walker in town the other day. We were wandering around peeing on a few walls and benches when suddenly a woman yelled, “Hey is that my Donnie?” My first thought was, well Lady if he’s your Donnie, what’s he doing with us?” However, Don went berserk and jumped all around kissing her and basically acting a bit nuts. He was happy to see someone from his past life who knew him “when.” We all like to have people who knew us “when.” In fact owner has a few of those old timers coming to hang out with her in a week or two. Can’t wait for those stories….oh wait I digressed, right? Sorry.
Check out the new reds and golds….Yahoo. We love it. But what we really love is our painted hallway door. It makes us all happy!
Anyway, the furniture has all been moved back into place, new places for us but soon they will be old places. Everything is fresh and clean and bright. Actually my fur looks pretty darn good up against the red walls in the living room. Shannon was right. We were bland. Wow, and I didn’t go crazy. See ya later.